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Sam Pepper handcuffs himself to women on the street, refusing to release one woman until she kisses him




In January, Sam Pepper uploaded a video called “How To Get A Girlfriend Easy” in which he sneaks up behind or beside unsuspecting women on the street and handcuffs them to himself. He then tells them they’re “his girlfriend now.”

When one victim reacts furiously, saying “No! I don’t know you! Take it off!” and demands that he remove the handcuffs, he refuses and replies with “We’re dating now.” She tries again, “Look, I don’t know where you’re from, but we don’t do this in America. Take this off,” while fighting with the cuffs. He refuses again, insisting they’re “going on a date.” She then tells him that she’s married, to which he says “No, you’re married to me now,” and refuses yet again to remove the handcuffs.

At the end of the video, another woman is pleading with him to undo the handcuffs, and he refuses to until she kisses him on the lips. Pepper appears to think the entire scenario is hilarious at best and endearingly misguided at worst, while the women being “pranked” are visibly livid, terrified, and profoundly uncomfortable.


We need to stop calling assault by white men on men of color and women of all races “pranks,” because it makes them seem lighthearted and fun, not like the violent criminal acts they are.







In the 1890s, when Freud was in the dawn of his career, he was struck by how many of his female patients were revealing childhood [sexual] victimization to him. Freud concluded that child sexual abuse was one of the major causes of emotional disturbances in adult women and wrote a brilliant and humane paper called “The Aetiology of Hysteria.” However, rather than receiving acclaim from his colleagues for his ground-breaking insights, Freud met with scorn. He was ridiculed for believing that men of excellent reputation (most of his patients came from upstanding homes) could be perpetrators of incest.
Within a few years, Freud buckled under this heavy pressure and recanted his conclusions. In their place he proposed the “Oedipus complex,” which became the foundation of modern psychology… Freud used this construct to conclude that the episodes of abuse his clients had revealed to him had never taken place; they were simply fantasies of events the women had wished for… This construct started a hundred-year history in the mental health field of blaming victims for the abuse perpetrated on them and outright discrediting of women’s and children’s reports of mistreatment by men.

― Lundy Bancroft

(via proletarianprincess)

read this carve it into your brains permanently etch it into your skulls r e a d  t h i s

(via miss-mizi)

i don’t know how to deal with this

(via transhumanisticpanspermia)


(via smallrevolutionary)

(Source: womensliberationfront)


Anonymous asked:

I was sexually abused as a child by my father for many, many years. I'm an adult now suffering complex PTSD as a result. I feel really terrible because even though my mum tried to help and never did anything to hurt me, she didn't stop what was going on. I know she was abused too and didn't have a lot of options but I still have a lot of hatred for her. Because she stayed with him and my abuse continued. I know she didn't exactly let it happen, but I don't know if I can forgive her.


Incest tw
Neglect tw
CSA tw

You don’t have to forgive anyone.

There is this narrative surrounding trauma that suggests we are only free/recovered/good when we forgive those you’ve hurt us. Well, that is bullshit. Because as it turns out, our recovery has nothing to do with the other person. It’s not about them. It’s about us.

And as unpopular as this may be among some of my colleagues, there is no one way to recover. I literally don’t care if spending two hours quacking like a duck is what gets you to a safe and healthy place. You do you. No one else gets to dictate this for you.

However…. forgiving parents is complicated. Like, my abuser was my dad, and my mom did literally nothing to help even though she knew. And I logically know that I don’t owe her shit, but I, too, feel pressure to forgive her. I feel like she deserves my forgiveness.

But it’s worth examining the reasons one feels this way. When I examined my own reasons I discovered that not forgiving her meant losing her, and that’s why I felt the pressure to do so. I love my mother, and I think in some weird, fucked up way, my mother loves me, but as they say in songs, love isn’t enough. It was her duty to protect me and care for me. She did not do that, and I don’t owe her shit. I sat down and weighed the consequences of either action. If I forgave her and was brought back into the fold, so to speak, I would have a family, but I would be in the situation of being constantly invalidated. If I chose not to forgive her, I would have no family, but I would constantly be able to honor the truth of my life.

I chose not to forgive her.

Now, what forgiveness means to you is going to be very personal, but no matter what you decide, it’s worth looking at the motivation on either side.

But please, remember that you don’t owe anyone your forgiveness. You don’t even own them your politeness. You owe them exactly nothing, so take some time to focus on your needs and motivations, and make the decision that is best for you.

If there are others pressuring you to forgive, it might be worth having a conversation with them. Frankly, this constant focus on forgiveness is so deeply invalidating…. I strongly believe that it was put in place to clean up the mess of surviving. Forgiveness isn’t about creating peace for the survivor. It’s about removing their pain from public view. And I’m not about that. I want all my messy shit on the table.

Take care.


She cries inside when she hears a man
yell, “I just RAPED you!” when he wins
a video game. No one knows what happened
to her when she was just seven years old, she
grew in a thrust that night, because a piece of her
womanhood was taken at an early age.
It’s ten years later and she still shakes
when someone touches her skin. But,
she won’t tell, she keeps it within.

He bites his lips, fighting back tears,
as his friend says, “Guys who are raped,
are just too weak to fight back.”
So he should never tell a single soul,
what happened when his dad was
drunk that night, and he was too
small and scared to win the fight.

They will make up the excuses that
she was “drunk!” and “Did you see what
she was wearing? Her ass was hanging
out, she was asking for it!” They will say,
“boys will be boys.” And the word rape will
be used in society to describe the
dominance of winning someone
in a game of Call of Duty. If you tell me
there’s no Rape Culture, then tell me
why victims are too afraid to speak

i.c. "He told me there was no Rape Culture."  (via delicatepoetry)
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